moulded new.

I make no claims of greatness,
I know what, and who I am,
I look for ways to succeed in my progressions for stagnation holds no place within my plan,
And in within it is learning lessons,
Making better on the promises from which was ran.

Humble in my approach,
With open eyes and a clear head,
Cautious to take notes and wrap my mind around the words that she said –
A transitional state,
from the inside out I see my old self and that skin shed,
To leave a hollow hole ready to be filled with new knowledge
Through a reflective sense of self; clarity achieved, a mindset polished.

Now in new minds a step back is seen only as a moment for consideration of the steps to be taken forward and further,
The capacity to change will lay dormant forever until you unearth –
Her,
She remains the reason for all good things that came, and the fortunes that followed calculated change,
So from now my cherished memories are counted and saved, to make light of a rainy day.

Greatness is yet to come and with patience it shall blossom within our actions without the need to mouth to fall open and say –

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displaced.

This world is beauty…
But broken.
By broken hearts and broken minds,
By our fixation on hopes
And dreams,
And expired time.

We live,
Capable of feeling
But existing without.
Capable of love and trust,
While weighed down by hearts of doubt.

Beneath blue skies and on bounties of green,
But our eyes turned downwards,
Fixated on screens.
A world full of beauty,
Of which we are undeserving,

Our Hell on Earth,
Where hearts are hurting.

cautious steps.

There is truth to come,
From the redemption which you seek.
Sights sought by blind men,
Yet blinding to those weak.
—-
There is a future,
Sewn deep within the questions on your mind.
Though the answers,
For the strong are alone to find.
—-
Walk out into the dawn with faith,
Hope beside you, your guidance.
There are Wars shared amongst us,
No weapons, just the words locked inside us.
—-
An adventure stands before you,
Child of wonder,
And a calm sea in your heart,
Thirsty for thunder.
—-
Soon approaches your day of glory,
It sits close to which you desire,
But wary, your approach when faced with friend or foe,
For we may miss the signs,
Of who was, or will become the liar.

away, in the grey.

Are you meant to find it difficult telling the people you love that you think your life isn’t worth living,

Because most of my days are dark, regardless of the sun,

And everyday another mission to explain my minds struggles and wishing,

That I could grip a gun,

Hold it against my skull and enjoy the last breath before its over.

//

The glass shaped silhouettes on the shelf are better friends,

My real ones speak back and tell me why I should live,

They make me smile and pretend,

These make living a little easier with every sip,

The beginning feeling like a means to an end,

Before beckoning another,

I’d let a blade make art of my neck if it wasn’t for my Mother,

I love her.

//

This pain…

Worse than heartbreak because love only weighs down hard on your chest,

Pains of the mind leave me dreaming that a tight rope would burn through the soft skin of my neck,

I’ve spent nights exploring scars and wondering what to decorate next,

Starting from the edges until the first strokes meet and connect to the rest.

//

Four bottles on a Friday,

Trying to see how many would keep me asleep beyond next week,

How many would it take for it to end and let them say that he was weak,

How many could I take before I beat my last streak?

Sink deeper with each,

Hold your breath and hope that you start drowning,

I hold one in my left hand, and the one in my right I’m downing.

//

Saturday hungover,

Family day plans and struggling to be sober,

Looking for sensation –

Hoping I’m still dreaming and the nightmare of life is finally over,

Pillowcase tear soaked,

Because my mind bares too much weight to let them fall on my shoulder.

//

Blue light keeps me locked in a world seeded in our palms

But far from reality,

Desensitised to my own pain through exposure the worlds harms,

Everyday a quarter spent shovelling through shit that is digital –

Doing the same shit, living the same day,

Chasing something new but only ever finding a deeper meaning of insanity.

//

I’m sorry,

To anyone that loves me I know these are words you wished you’d never hear,

Once I thought the same, but now I’m trapped in this friendship with my fears,

But I’m not scared –

I only hope that you would smile if I chose to go,

I hope every star shines brighter

As I accept the silence of below.

stained.

If you can find truth in what I say,

Then who am I to admit that I lied,

Why disturb your peace, or deliver hurt

If you could keep the look inside your eyes?

A selfish energy nurtured

Now, too late to change,

I keep my secrets (forever and always)

Within your heart, reserve my space.

Within myself, I hear

And so see

Every fault I own

And every fault, I let own me.

I play my hand, full of guilt,

Shuffling through the pain

That you would own, should you know

In a world where hearts are pure.

disconnect and desire.

You demand respect
And sense from the intentions of my actions,
An emotional depth beyond my strength,
And an understanding distant,
Yet ever tempting.

You’ve grown on fictions
And dreams of grandeur,
Expectations difficult for any man to match,
And yet your patience is unwavering,
In your heart, your wishes only exist in truth.

Where your mind wanders
And what you’re heart desires,
Are oppositional ends of rope with too much tension,
Waiting to be broken.

Closely guarded secrets,
An interior beyond guarded gates
And face full of beckoning gestures,
An enigma eager to be solved,
Yet desperate to remain hidden.

I only hope to learn,
To navigate a path beyond physicality
And into intimacy,
Should you let me.

burns.

break or be broken –
a fragility dependent on the motions of intent,
queries of love leveled on the tensile strength of trust,
the strength of emotion weighted to each side, spent.

design flaws that hold our dreams to the flames of danger.
yet it is with the same warmth that passion burns,
the same guiding light, the skies warming brazier,
that everyday shapes our world, as its coals are turned.

will you live life as the lover,
chasing a fleeting dream?
or the eclipsing moon,
a cold hand and weightless shoulder, deaf and distant to her screams.

though you may love,
be loved,
or know it never,
each will bring a pain that passes,
and scars that last forever.

against time.

Foolish creature,
Only men void of caution court friendships with time,
Time encompasses all and draws all lines,
Time will play all parts the game would offer
and own the truths to all lies.

Time is no ally of mine,
And with that, it is none of yours,
I have dreamt in contemplation of the look within its eye,
And the narrow path within was plagued with roads coarse,
And littered with glass keys to mirrored doors.

 
Time is of our interested but uninterested in us,
Because everything time finds in us can be found in other ‘stuff’,
Playthings –
Toys for the amusement of an element that is in itself and without others remains,
Time holds the knowledge of everything that is and has been,
Yet has us tripping hurdles in man-made mazes within our brains.

Trivial in your pursuit for the companionship of one owed to all yet owned by none,
Is this a fault I mark in my mind as one of your own creation?
No…
Yet you’d be mistaken to think that would let you pursue time without first knowing you are on his clock, And as we traverse his face in search of answers we draw closer to the end of our journey,
And he will care not.

Gods and Kings did not descend upon us to find friendship amongst Men,
We are here to serve,
And with every birth will be thought, and with thought will be words,
With words will be passion, and passion makes hearts burn,
As bridges are burnt we are left to walk the world alone,
And as the ash settles man remains within Gods Earth as dust and bone…
With every birth there is life,
And with every life there must be death,
Once everything upon this rock by Time is graded,
We all will have failed his test.